Happy Women’s Day!

Posted on March 8, 2017 by Diana

Today, in a way, we celebrate life, since women are the ones bringing children in this world, with the help of men. Yes, with their help, let’s not underestimate their role in all this, nor the greatness. But before we even take a moment to remember that we are here because of our mothers and because our dads were or still are by their sides, let me do a review of what we celebrate today. From my perspective, because I have my own just as well as somebody else has their own.

Happy anniversary to me! I was warned early on in my life that I can’t play football or war or with cars because I am a girl, I should play with dolls and play mum and behave nicely. I had no idea why it was so unusual to go fishing because in the end I loved it, yet everybody had a reason to make fun of me. Except my fishing companions. Then when things got serious I was the one to blame for ending a relationship. Yeah, I abandoned somebody who really needed my help… after years of being together and at least a few of trying, leaving my things and dreams aside and struggling to talk sense into a mature human being and make him realise that drug addiction is bad and it needs to be dealt with yesterday, if possible. But I’m the bailer, how dared I? It’s my fault I didn’t offer the support he needed. Funny he realised this after I walked away and didn’t say that he needs my help while I was still there.

To men I am too young, too old, too skinny, too fat, boobs not big enough, not smart enough, not the right passport, too independent, too talkative, too clingy, too demanding, too crazy, “what do you mean you don’t like to hold hands and make out at rock concerts?” And every now and then I find out that I need to be rescued and treated like I am a helpless princess because I cannot do it on my own and I need a husband and a father to my kids and he’s just the perfect man to do it! Why am I always smiling? Why am I speaking my mind? Why do I have an opinion? Why do I fail? Why am I not flawless?

If I fight for the man that I love and I say what I feel than I have no pride and I am an easy catch, so I am not interesting, I left my guards down, he can walk away, if I am indifferent, I play hard to get than I am frigid. Don’t I know men love playing “catch”? Don’t men know that I don’t like playing and I prefer to be me with the ones I love? Being me is not good, it’s not gonna get me the man I love and I have to watch him play “catch” with another, preferably right under my nose and eyes because hey, that’s life, you win some, you lose some and you just have to take it!

If I go out dating and sleeping around I am either a modern woman or a s**t, depends who you’re asking. If I don’t do this, even though everybody else is doing it, and we all have to be a part of the herd to be accepted though originality is demanded more and more nowadays, it is also faked more and more nowadays, I am old fashioned and close-minded. And of course if I don’t go out dating, how am I going to meet my guy? You know, the one that’s meant for me like in the stories? If I knew the answer to this question I wouldn’t be writing this blog.

And at the end of the day, feeling guilty for bailing on the one who needed me, rejected by the man I love because I had the guts to tell him so, not that because of this he should have felt obliged to love me back, disappointed because in the eyes of some men I am still a helpless woman, disgusted because I hate modern hooking for the sake of not being alone because you’re lame if you drink a glass of wine alone, or sad because again I’ve been labelled as not “fit” for whatever norms, I go home to a cold bed and a dinner alone and some binge-watching on Netflix. Because I am not capable of getting myself a good guy, I don’t put myself out there, I don’t play by the rules, I don’t follow the norms, I don’t fake it and I am… whatever. But I have to hold my head up high and deal with this, besides dealing with life in general, you know, the wake up, look human, go to work, take care of yourself stuff, do what you love and smile, I must play the strong independent woman because if I show signs of weakness I am lame and we live in a world where females are super-women and they have to do everything otherwise somebody somewhere is going to point a finger and start. So happy anniversary to me, aren’t I a tough cookie?

Women’s Day changed a lot since it was just the day I used to buy flowers for my mom. And sometimes she didn’t even seem as happy about it as I wanted her to be, you know, like in the movies, though I know she was, but now I kinda understand what other things were on her mind. Kinda, because I am sure she was worrying about totally different things than what I worry about now, but I guess and hope I’ll get there one day. And worry not, life’s good, life’s life in the end. This is just to show the type of “silly” pressures one feels every now and then, women and men likewise, just that sometimes they don’t seem that “silly”…

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A Street Cat Named Bob

Posted on February 18, 2017 by Diana

fullsizerenderI don’t remember how I ran into this story, probably Facebook popped it up among the hundreds of cat videos that come on my feed. But I do know that in November 2012, when I accidentally got to Covent Garden because of my bad habit of not using a map, I didn’t know anything about Bob nor James. If I did, I would have gone looking for them. Shortly after, however, I ordered the first book about Bob and read it, because yes, it was a book about a cat. And I love cats, if you didn’t realise that by now. What I didn’t know was that this was not a book about a cat. Or not just that. I won’t go into details because I don’t want to give any spoilers. If you are curious about the story buy the book, take it from the library, download it, read it. Or better said, the books. I offered them to some cat people as presents and I haven’t heard one who said they didn’t like it. The best reaction I got from my parents: bought the book for mom, who wasn’t very impressed about me ranting all the time about this great book about a cat, mom started reading it, soon came dad, took the book and finished reading it in less than a day than gave it back to mom so she can enjoy the rest of the story. Both liked it a lot!

Or if you don’t want to read the books, watch the movie. Yes, there is a movie about Street Cat Bob. And Bob plays in it. And he even attended the premiere and was pampered by The Duchess of Cambridge who attended the event as well. I finally watched the movie today. I must say that probably, to someone who is not familiar with the story or all the details in the books, the movie might not make as much sense as to someone who is a fan. Yet, it is a very light and fun film worth watching when one wants to chill. Though Bob is cute when he’s playing himself, the story is not as shallow as it seems. Yes, there are a lot of tearjerking scenes that make things sweet, the books are way better but the movie is worth watching, since both the real Bob and the real James are part of it. And also because now if I think about it, the narrative behind these two popular culture texts teaches us a lesson. The lesson I learnt is that I can’t watch anything without analysing it… Ok, joking. It only reinforced my belief that cats are amazing. And I learnt other stuff about addictions, homelessness  and why I should be buying The Big Issue when I am in London.

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Drifting: my favourite thing!

Posted on February 8, 2017 by Diana

img_5816Some days ago I’ve been at an event organised at Berghs School of Communication by SheSays Sthlm. I really wanted to blog about it as I enjoyed the event a lot, and the concept behind SheSays, which is presented as the only global creative network for women, but then I remembered I don’t like motivational speeches. However, the ladies who talked to us there shared some really interesting stories, and there wasn’t one speaker that was like the other, they were so different that the only idea that is left in my head is that there is no universal recipe for success, or only one way to “get there”, you just have to do it your way. Funny enough, one of the speakers said that she has no idea what she is doing but she is doing it. Sounds like me when I decided to move to Sweden and here I am now, 2 years later…

Sitting in the main library of Stockholm University, a place where I could find some peace and quiet for the first time in days, perfect to focus on writing. I wish the library were open till late at night, I’d do a lot of writing here, as anywhere else I get distracted by other stuff. It’s like in that pic that’s online with a person who really wants to fall asleep, that has a text that goes like this: “One sheep, two sheep, cow, pig, Old McDonalds had a farm. Hey Macarena!”(Google it!) But I came here with the purpose of working on one thing and ended up working on something totally different because, well, the first thing I did after sitting down at the desk was to check on the news, and that drifted my focus.

But going back to what I should focus on: music. Listening to some radio on Spotify, the song below popped among the suggestions. The song itself is from 2001, which is about the time I started asking myself questions about music’s meaning, and develop my interest in the politics beyond its rhythm, or most of the times, beyond its guitar riffs. But I also remember that back in 2001 I went through a surgery that kept me calm for about 3 months. During those 3 months I had the medical permission to skip sports classes and I used to run home to watch TV for 45 minutes. This TV watching involved jumping from one music channel to the other. This song, along with “In Joy and Sorrow” by HIM, were the reasons why I was doing that, simply because back then the TV was my only source of music and music videos and because I loved both ballads up to the point of driving all my family/neighbours/friends crazy. Also funny enough, during that same time we were about 6 or 7 of us that went through the same surgery. But going back to the concept of the song and especially the video, the same narrative comes up in Francois Feldman’s video for “Les Valses de Vienne” which was shot in the same location as Simple Minds’s “Don’t You (Forget About Me)” and linking all these together shows the way my brain works when music is involved and why sometimes I find it so hard to write about the message hidden behind a song. It’s there, it’s obvious, how do I put it on paper?

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Short Trip to Gdansk

Posted on January 9, 2017 by Diana

img_5638After complaining that last year I boarded a plane more often than my nerves could handle, I decided that this year I should do that even before its first week has had the time to be over. So I flew to Gdansk. I mean, why not? RyanAir were kind enough to have tickets with 5 €, Wizz were not far behind, B&Bs have excellent location there so awaaaay I went.  Just as some of my previous journeys, I encountered a flight delay. I must admit that nothing beats a four hour flight delay for a 35 minutes flight, this time I only waited two hours for 55 minutes up in the air. The delay was caused by bad weather conditions so I really started to question whether I should depart or not. Yet, I did. I never landed on a runway covered in snow so it was interesting to see what happens in this conditions at an airport.

img_5672Once there, the trip to the city is easy: get on a train, buy a ticket on board, get off at the train station and walk 10 minutes to the city centre. Things would have been perfect but, because of the cold my phone went off and I found myself in front of all these very beautiful old buildings without an exact address of my hotel. Talking about relying on technology instead of the trusty pen and paper technique. I found it in the end as I remembered its name.

My hotel, Dom Schumannów, was no fancy luxurious five star hotel, but a great, cozy, vintage house for dwarves. Super friendly personnel, clean, great location, warm but such a small bed. During the night, however I moved, my feet were off it. But I was happy to have such a cozy place to crash at night, as somewhere around 10 o’clock in the evening I felt like retreating to my room, with a snack box from KFC and Pink Floyd, studying the picture and information on Daniel Fahrenheit that were displayed on one of the walls of my room. He is from Gdansk, I had no idea!

img_5677I didn’t have much time to look around the city but what I got to see impressed me. Its centre is clean and taken care of. The people in the restaurants and cafes are polite and friendly and ready to help those like me who want to get away from the cold. Because of this very reason, the cold, I couldn’t do my typical “wandering on random streets” – type of visit, but did find myself in front and inside St. Mary’s Church, one of the largest brick churches in the World.

My brief visit ended with a quick (and late) Polish breakfast and off I was to the airport to deal with another flight delay which allowed me to have another coffee, work on some BBC articles and watch planes take off. For now I have no other scheduled trips but don’t give me a reason… No wait, I have a few “pending”.

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Happy 2017!

Posted on December 31, 2016 by Diana

2016This day… again. The day when I am supposed to write a cheesy post about how the year that passes has been, about my New Year resolutions. Then I remember: I don’t make New Year resolutions. The best things that have happened to me have been unplanned and unexpected, swept me off my feet and took me out of my comfort zone so I will keep it like this. It makes life more exciting, unpredictable and beautiful.

A lot of things have been told about 2016, and they weren’t pretty. No, it hasn’t been the best of years and it didn’t make me wait eagerly for 2017, it just made me think with fear about what might happen next. Or curiosity.

2016 has been a year of collecting memories, some of them in the photo collage pictured here, of learning, of meeting amazing people and loosing dear friends, of enjoying lots of tennis, concerts, passing Swedish exams and not only. For 2017 I only want to be healthy and happy, and this is what I wish to you all as well! The rest I am pretty sure we can handle, with a cup of coffee and a glass of wine in our hands. One for the morning, the other for the late hours of the night. Happy New Year!

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